Kris Laser Pistol Meets his Fans

“Hello, this is Angry Schmo again, Welcome to the first town hall for the President of the Internet, with Kris Laser Pistol. This is basically an AMA, so let’s start this.” “Thank you Angry Schmo. I have to say, you were one of my influences when I first started ScrewTube. Your videos opened my eyes … Continue reading Kris Laser Pistol Meets his Fans →

Wow – What a Debate

When I choose the moniker of Angry Schmo to review video games, I was just having some fun. But what I just saw was massively messed up. You have Kris Laser Pistol, a superhero from the meme wars and GamerGate. He’s laid back, fun-loving, and relaxed. He’s tired of the political bassholing on the Internet, … Continue reading Wow – What a Debate →

The First Presidential Debate

Angry Schmo walks up to the podium. “Welcome to the first Presidential debate for the President of the Internet. I am Angry Schmo, your moderator. I will ensure these two little bitches keep in line. “Like the Team Debate, there will be opening statements, open debate between those statements, questions from me and the audience, … Continue reading The First Presidential Debate →

The Human Ray of Sunshine’s Platform

Duck Team Magenta Team Magenta is ruining everything. They hate anyone who supports President Thrumpy and will cancel you. They hate hope and are just a bunch of nihilists who will destroy everything to get their way. I am the smartest and most talented member of Team Yellow. I will fight them until we destroy … Continue reading The Human Ray of Sunshine’s Platform →

Kris Laser Pistol’s Platform

Politically Neutral/classic Team Magenta The Internet has become a place where political bassholes ruin everything. Games are not woke enough/too woke. People naming their Hogwarts Legacy characters Imma Biggit, because they’re pwning Team Magenta. It’s just a game! We need to stop being political bassholes and stop taking the politics into things where it doesn’t … Continue reading Kris Laser Pistol’s Platform →

The Election is On

“Thanks for watching my Podcast. Ever since I was fired from Faux news, I’ve been working hard to deliver the news that matters. Whether I Interview Valdamort Pooptin after he invaded the UCrane, or going after the election fraud in ‘Murica, which took former President Thrumpy’s re-election win away from him, or asking ‘Murica to … Continue reading The Election is On →

The Election According to Rachel Madcow

“Good evening viewers. This year, there is two vital elections. First between President Joey Binder and former President Donald Thrumpy. But tonight, this broadcast is not about them. The second is an auspicious election about the fate of the Internet,” Rachel says. “Let me break things down. It started just after January, where Kris Laser … Continue reading The Election According to Rachel Madcow →

Team Yellow – The Final

“Welcome to the elimination debate for Team Yellow. I am Anne Robinson, your moderator for this debate. If you pass, you get to campaign on why you deserve to be the President of the Internet. But for five of you, you will be eliminated. “Like Team Magenta, people will eliminated through each phase. “So, let’s … Continue reading Team Yellow – The Final →

Team Magenta – The Final

“Good Morning candidates. I am Anne Robinson, and you will only qualify if you pass my tests. If not, you will be cancelled with extreme prejudice - your dreams of being the President of the Internet dashed against the harsh stones of reality!” Anne says. “The first elimination round will be your opening statements, begin!” … Continue reading Team Magenta – The Final →

Chasing Clout, An Analysis of the Yellow Debate 2

Hello Human. Thank you for reading my analysis. I am here to give you the analysis of the second Yellow debate. The humans chasing after the President for the Internet title on Team Yellow are just as pathetic as Team Magenta. As I said before, I am programmed to keep you engaged in all content … Continue reading Chasing Clout, An Analysis of the Yellow Debate 2 →